How do you keep marriage alive with the pressures of life with young children?

My husband and I have been happily married for 5.5 years. We have a 13 month old precious angel. We never fought before we had him, but now that's all we do-even though he was planned and we wanted him very much! How do you not let your busy life tear your relationship apart? Between working full time, chores, bills, and sleepless nights, where do you find time for each other? Please help!!!How do you keep marriage alive with the pressures of life with young children?
My husband and I have four small children, and I'm pregnant again. Believe me, its HARD. My husband is a stockbroker, and literally puts in 50hour weeks almost every week. The way we've found to get around this is date night. We take the kids to his parents home(they live about 45 minutes away) on Saturday nights, and we go out(movies, dinner, running errands together, whatever it is) without the children. It's one on one time, and it is the BEST time of the week for me, especially because I rarely get to see my husband.


If you have family or a close trusted friend nearby, ask if they could watch your son one night a week for a few hours, and go out with your husband! You don't even have to go anywhere, you could lay on the couch together all night, just as long as you're together and free of distractions. It will really help your marriage.How do you keep marriage alive with the pressures of life with young children?
Stop tackling work, chores, bills, sleepless nights, taking care of baby, etc - as individuals. Instead, treat all of it as a challenge that you're taking on together, on your journey in life. Every bit of everything you're doing (even when you do it individually) is a part of the whole that is your marriage and family. Show interest %26amp; concern in the tasks that the other is doing that contribute to your own family's growth %26amp; happiness. Encourage each other to take breaks %26amp; grow on your own.





It's got to be mutual, though. You both need to be able to trust that the other person is working hard towards your shared goal of a happy family, too.





To do that, you've got to connect with each other on a regular basis. You've got to get back into each other's souls %26amp; be assured that the foundation of love %26amp; mutual respect is still there. You've got to feel valued, just as you need to make your spouse feel valued, too.





My husband %26amp; I work opposite shifts. We also work part-time on the weekends delivering moon jumps. And, we are both involved in PTO, scouts, school volunteering, etc. Then, there's the regular housework, car maintenance, yard work, etc.





What really helps us stay connected is the two nights a week when he's off work. After the kids go to bed. No matter how tired we are. We stop whatever we're doing, stay up late %26amp; reconnect with each other. Sure, the talk turns to kids, school, family, etc at some point in the evening, but it's almost always one of us complimenting the other - or thanking the other - or marvelling at the amazing family that we have, how cool the kids are, how goofy the dogs or cats are, etc. It's just the two of us, reminding each other how much we love doing this whole family thing together, how much we appreciate having each other in our lives.





Then, those brief 3-4 hours are over, we go to sleep, spend the next day a little more exhausted than most, but are renewed, knowing that we're not alone in all of this chaos.
As a mother of 5 kids, 2 girls and 3 boys it was very difficult juggling the home,work ,bills kids,and a husband the stress was sometimes very unbearable, but you must remember that no matter how difficult it gets you are still the most important person in the whole scenario and losing control of the situation will not benefit you or your family in the end ,stand tough and take your vitamins..I am now married for 32 years and all the kids are grown and on their own, life is much better.
Honey, I'll admit, it's HARD! Remember that you promised ';for better or for worse'; and even though this is a very happy time family-wise, it's not easy (or even happy) marriage-wise.





I see date night has already been suggested, but believe me, it will work wonders. Even if you can't get out of the house, put the baby in bed at night, then go sit with your husband and talk. Play board games. Have a glass of wine by candlelight and listen to ';your'; songs. Just do something together that's for the two of you!





If you find you don't have anything to talk about (hey, it happens sometimes!), reminesce about what you two did when you were dating. Talk about your favorite dates and why they were so special. Go through your wedding album together. Just make sure you write the day in stone and don't change it for anything! Make it a weekly event that you both can look forward to. Send him little notes in his briefcase reminding him about your date night and tell him how much you're looking forward to spending time just with him. I'm telling you, it will do wonders for your relationship.
been there done that! I have 3 kidos under 4 yrs old,, i have been married almost 6 yrs,,,we also have goats bunnies and competitions and dogs and a life and my husband works 60 plus hrs a week,,,,We almost divorced a yr ago,,,but we found that we love each other so much,,,we started to date again,,,we would let his mom watch the kids on a friday or sat night and we would go to the country club and eat and then go for a walk and just talk then we would go home and it would just be us,,no kidos,,sometimes we need to put our marraige above the kids,,we are very loving parents but there are times you need to be with your husband too!


best wishes!!!
You have never fought before you had him? That is a poor excuse. It has nothing to do with him. It's both of you. We have been together 16 years. Our kids are 11 and 13.


We have very little time for each other but we do our part to make it work. Every year, we get a three week vacation. We spend that entire three weeks together as a family.


Nobody ever said that being a spouse and/or a parent would be easy. Work it out. Place the child first, than each other. If you don't, imagine how screwed up that kid will be seeing you two battle. He'll never want to be in a relationship.


We use every waking moment together. It's worth it too. You'll do fine if you can get past the arguing.
You have to make time be with your spouse. It's very easy to get caught up in the life of your child, but remember, the most important thing you can do for him is to show him what a loving relationship between his parents can mean for him and his relationship with his spouse when he gets married.





Get back to dating one another. Find a friend or family member who can take your son for one night a month, and just go to dinner. You'll likely end up talking about your son anyway, but still, it's time just for the two of you.





Or if you and your husband share a common hobby/interest, do that. Tennis?





My wife and I took ballroom dancing lessons about 2 years ago and it was great. We learned something together, and spent 45 minutes a week uninterrupted.
You need a date night. Find a baby sitter for a couple of hours and do things you did before your baby came. Or find a nice routine of time together after your son goes to sleep. My fiance and I write letters to each other and text messages all the time. One night a week will really work. Doesn't need to be anything expensive. Go to the park, take a walk, or just sit and have an adult conversation about things other than bills and babies.
When the kid is asleep is when you find time for each other. Or just quit your job and take care of the child all day.